Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Who The Hell Is That Supposed To Be? Pt. 1

(WARNING: This blog post is going to be mildly racially insensitive. Deal with it.)

So, I spent the better part of my summer working on the same doll. She wasn't a particularly challenging doll. She wasn't even very original (see last blog post where I explained that violating trademarks is really the only way to go). She was, however, very hard to name.
Here's a picture of the doll:
 Now, apparently, if you're a member of my family or a friend of mine you don't have a clue who this is supposed to be. In fact, you haven't even figured out that the doll is Asian yet (I blame the button eyes, they remove the squint). Now that you've established that the doll is in fact Asian you're really confused. You're going through every Asian trademarked entity you can think of.

Is it Po?
Nah, Po has green eyes...
Is it Katara?

No hair loopies...
I got it! It's Hello Kitty!
Wait a minute... Hello Kitty's Asian????

Sadly, at this point you have realized that you've exhausted your socially acceptable claims to Asian knowledge. You are absolutely not going to admit to knowing anything about anime for fear of being labeled a social outcast. I don't blame you. You see, a mere Internet game is not worth coming out of the closet for, but I will say that in time you will emerge you beautiful butterfly you.



However, in the interest of not outing you before you're ready I am going to politely point out (fortheFIFTHTIME) that the doll that you see pictured above is none other than China/Disney's own Mulan.

Say what?
Oh, so you like everyone else of my acquaintance is unable to remember the first part of the movie in which Mulan meets the Matchmaker, destroys her chances of ever marrying a respectable man (snerk), sings a depressing song about being an embarrassment, hacks off half her hair and decides to join the army? Let me refresh your memory, during that time she was dressed like this:
I forgive you though, because after thinking about it I realized that you were all too busy worrying about Grandma's sanity as she ran into traffic. Totally acceptable. Almost.

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